Woken up

I woke up thinking about him again. Yesterday was fine and I was distracted because I woke up getting on my phone. Honestly, I wonder how long this is going to last. I shouldn’t pay attention to it because it like when you’re at school or waiting and if you kept looking at the time, it would just appeared slower. It’s sad in my heart. I wonder why I think what we think. It should be extremely logical to simply decided to be done with someone and you can just be happy. This is interesting. I want to meet him but not him. I want to know the real him, but I don’t think I will be happy with the result. It seems like there is not much I can do. It is sadden. Why do I like something that is so not great, unstable. Why do I want something is I idealized about to be better. It’s absolutely stupid, because it doesn’t work like that. People are NOT going to change overnight on their own. They’re not. He’s a coward and has no gut. It’s sad how the only thing that he’s good at he uses it–compromise. He actually mean aka manipulation. It’s sad that I discovered it late until the 4 months. It is absolutely sad. But at least I’m out of it. “Now that you’re free, run.” God has someone better for me. He is preparing me to be ready too. He has the perfect timing.

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