So if..

So if I were kept thinking of getting back with him, what are the good reasons?

I didn’t realized that I, in fact, perhaps I love Chad? Is love something you just know? Or is it longing? I don’t know. I think I might have love him? Maybe? Or is this longing? Even if he manipulated, deceived, and was being extremely mean. So why did I still love and care for something that is like that. I miss him. It seems like I can’t let go. It seems like I’m stuck. I don’t know why. I am being this way. What should I do? Is love controllable? Is this like some sort of crazy voo doo? Should I just go on in, be stupid, and embrace the disappointments? Do I need to learn things hard way? What kind of relationship do I want? Do I just miss being in a relationship or do I actually wanted to go back? What is it? I don’t know. I need help? Maybe I need to wait longer because I wanted to be sure. I miss his face. I miss his smell.

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