So I talked to the therapist today. I told her my value. She told me that it seems like I regretted the decision. Well, don’t we all have that regret anyways after break up and isn’t it normal? I mean I am doing better emotionally. So much better. It is a blessing. I honestly thanked God for it. Also, I don’t know what to do at this point like I don’t. She told if I want I can contact him, text him to see. Well, boy I also told her I am scared of being rejected or hurt again. So, here is the thing, one) I could be rejected, he could have told me, I have moved on, etc. two) even if we get into the relationship, I am scared of how it will turn out. I don’t know if this is just wasn’t it or I am hindering myself from something. It is one or the other. Maybe the fact that I am feeling this way is 1) we weren’t it 2) I am hindering/limiting myself.
Like may be there is something I need to fix and is wrong with me or perhaps it is the relationship itself that no matter what it is Not going to work, etc.
What do I want is a good question?
I want a great support system. Someone who would support me, help me etc.
Someone who will hold me accountable and have God be the center of our lives.
Someone who can handle me? Maybe I need to handle myself, not them.
Someone fun, funny, to lighten things up.
Will I am going to like everything about relationship? Probably not.
Is the companionship crap worth it? Not really.
Do I need to figure out this or will I simply going to wait.
I will wait. I will wait. I will wait. I will wait.
It was also my fault, of course. I didn’t;t communicate my feelings, etc.
Alright well, let just talk after the test, ok? OK? YEAH?