Skate and Friend are FUN

Since I was young, about 6 or 7 years of age, I remembered enjoying rollerskating around the house. It was fun, fast, and required balance.

Today, I went to skate with my sister, who does not really wanted to skate, but she was willing to along side with me. She knows how much I enjoy skating for fun.

The feeling of moving the legs, the farther the feet push against the ground, the faster I move. The feeling of the air brushing through my face. The tightened of my calves in order to move forward and my arms going back and forth to achieve the desire balance, speed, and position. The experience was grand!

Last time I was skating, I got to meet a group of boys that skated really well! They were smooth, fast, and furious (like the title of a movie, Fast and Furious). They made skating looks easy and appealing. They could skate backward and done interesting tricks. They absolutely love to stop abruptly to startle their friends and also love to play tag, you’re it!

So I got a hold of one of the boys in the group, after realizing that he was not a boy, but a young adult because he was three years older than I was. I asked him if he could teach me how to skate backward. He sort of trying to teach me how to do so, but it was actually a 7 years old boy, who could skate so well, that taught and offered me tricks on how to skate backward. He and his dad participated, but I did not achieve the move fully, but was beginning to learn so. It was a good start to my new skating-moves. I would have to say that I had actually improved my backward skating move today. I was sort of understanding about the move, but what I learned today was not to think too deeply about the motion because it made me moved stiffly, but rather to simply not look at my feet and as Nike says, “Just Do It.” So that was what I did, I just do it and the result was better! If I had a chance to skate again, I definitely wanted to improve my speed; I wanted to skate backward faster, because it is where the fun behold! I also will wear something more comfortable. I was wearing a thermal legging underneath my jeans and it was absolutely not the most comfortable to skate wearing such. I preferred wearing a good knee pads, gym shorts, and sport t-shirt while skating.

One highlight of the day was that I met a little girl named Angel and her mom, who has a nickname called Red. Red told me that she did not like the color red even though, some people called her so. I don’t remember how she acquired the name, Red, but it was certainly an interesting name. Angle, on the other hand, is as sweet and nice as her name suggested. She was friendly and helpful as she was trying to make sure I would not fall, even though, she had fallen more than three times herself, while I only fallen once. Oh, little Angel. She was so talkative and gave my sister and I a group hug before Skate World closes.

Another interesting occasion also happened at Skate World today. Even before the winter break started, I had applied to numerous jobs to work at my hometown. I applied for opening positions at a nearby groceries store, fast food restaurants, and to be a barista. I have not hear back from most of them, but for the ones that I wanted to work for such as a job to be a barista and a bagger at a grocery store, I was rejected on all of the positions at a groceries store and I think that I probably will not be getting a job as a barista either, considering the fact that I will only be working for two weeks if hired. The employers highly do not wanted to train someone who only will be working for two weeks!😆 So I think, this reasons heavily influenced why I was not offered a job 😓.

But guessed what! It is also likely that I will be getting a job soon because I went to Skate World today, not planing on getting a job there, but asked two of the employees who worked there, whether they are hiring tight now and both said, “Yes,” so I called the manager, gave him a genuine smile, and asked if he was hiring and he said the same thing and both employees told me. I told him about the 2 weeks working time frame and he was about to give me the results that other employers had previously told me, but I talked my way through until he told me to meet him tomorrow after 2 in the afternoon, and that’s when I knew, I could be getting a two week winter break job like I had hoped.

The only thing right now that would be holding me back from getting the soon to be, hopefully, funnest job I ever will have is that I might not be able to spend time with my lovely little sister, Gift. I love her so much. She makes me laugh. I can probably say that she is my best friend. I thank God for strengthen our relationship because we are getting closer to each other because of his blessings. Anyway, if I were to get this job, which hopefully will allows for me to skate as I had wanted because it is a job we are talking about here ultimately. The main reason why I was interested in the job primarily was that I could skate more; however, it might be such case. But, yeah, if I were to get this job, it would also mean that I will not spend much time with my sister or my dad. There are something that money cannot buy such as time and love. I will ask for God guidance, but I also feel like I sort of already knew the answer and I think that if I were to ask my dad, he would also tell me that it is okay not to work. My sister, on the opposite end, might supports my decision, but I can also see that she did not really want me to work either because she like having me around. It seems to me, right now, that I might not be able to have this job after all and it is not a guarantee that this job will allows for me to skate more either. I will probably be assisting customers and not skating as I wish. 🤔 So yeah.. too bad so sad, no spending money for this winter break. 😤

Before I went to Skate World, I also met up with my good high school friend, Tooba. We chatted at Starbucks, even though she arrived approximately 40 minutes late for our date. I was sort of a little frustrated at the time and considered leaving as I waited for her. I texted her wanting to say something intended to sound unappreciated about the situation, but I did not, because I thought about Jesus. I knew in my heart that Jesus will wanted me to turn the other cheeks. He reminded me of my own mistakes because I had been late in the past as well. He reminded me that we are not perfect, so when we met I greeted her with a hug. She apologized and I can saw how that she was sorry, so I dismissed the mistake. Tooba handed me a gift that she brought with her to  give to me. I was touched and was so glad that I decided on not leaving because that would affected our friendship and great conversations that we were to have. Before, I met Tooba, I had prayed that the Lord would lead the conversations and that he would allow me to be selfless and to have a nice, intimate conversations, that they would flow well, and the Lord saw that the requests were good, so he granted me a great time with my friend, Tooba amongst the aroma of coffee, people waiting for their drink at Starbucks. We had such a great time that I wanted to hangout some more, but we eventually went home because I did not want the drinks that her brother and my sister had asked us to order before we leave to be melted.

Anyway, today was fun and it is getting late, so I am heading to bed. Goodnight!

I couldn’t believe I am feeling this way

I am not sure why, I am feeling this way. I don’t know it is me or her. Well, right now I only will understand my feelings. I have confessed that since I left home after I came to visit my family for the Thanksgiving break, I missed them so much. When I finally arrived back to my apartment and I felt the emptiness of the place and there was no family, not my sister or my dad. I was upset and even more upset now as I am typing, so I finally moved on quickly, didn’t know how I did it, but I simply moved on and didn’t think much about them.

Since, Thanksgiving day, I didn’t really called them either. I didn’t remember trying to call them as much. I knew that my dad would try to FaceTime me, but I didn’t take the call seriously and I didn’t even try to call back. My sister also tried to call me, but I also simply ignored. I think I am starting to taste the medicine.

To be honest, I have always been not good at keeping in touch with anyone. I simply don’t and I think it’s rooted in my selfishness or whatever they may be.

I think, this is God trying to teach me something. I think he’s trying to teach me to care for others. I know that I am selfish, but I also realized that I am very selfish.

Now, I am starting to feel sort of neglected by my sister whom I have not been thinking much of. I am starting to realized that she did missed me, but I right now I think I am sort of unintentionally pushing her away, pushing my family away and not considered. All those FaceTime called that I missed and did not attempted to call back. I must tell them and addressed it to them, because it is uncaring and selfish. I am not sure how to feel right now. I honesty am don’t know.  I feel awful, and wronged against them.

I have not been good with any of them, uncaringly. I simply do my own thing and did not pay much attention to them.

I think I must try now. I cannot expected a plant to grow beautifully on their own. I must also do the work, such as watering, giving it nutrients, pruning it, loving it, and caring for it.

Jesus please helps me as I will not be able to achieve this on my own. I am selfish, prideful, and uncaring or inconsiderate of others. Please help me see the thing that I have been blind to, please help me open my eyes O, God.

Jesus, I asked of you to help me strengthen my relationship with my family and relatives through your power and love. Please show me how to love them and be selfless when I am with them, O God.

Jesus, please help me, please help me.

What’s Mindfulness and Ego?

I just had a talked with a, about to be resigned, professor who if he were not to retire, would have been my professor to intro to computer science class, next semester. However, he told me that his wife is ill, therefore, he needs to spend this time together and potentially travel to Spain with their two daughters. He was a person whom told me about this term “mindfulness.” It is a term I have heard of before, but did not put in much thought to it. He also mentioned the word, “ego.”

Professor Benitez Noe has all grey hair, not that much wriggle, and a great smile and teeth. If I had to guessed his age, he might be well around, about 65-68 years of age, taking into context that he would still be teaching. He got his doctorate at the University of Purdue, a pretty well known university and the Purdue.owl website, is the website, in which, I used to do a better citation.

Anyway, I don’t know what the Bible tells me about these terms, mindfulness and ego. If I searched, it would be interested to see these terms in the Bible.

Now, that Dr. Benitez mentioned the term, ego, I am starting to question myself that I might have had experienced this term before. I simply didn’t know that it has a term in itself. I wonder if ego and pride correlates. I, for sure, knew that pride is something I have experienced with and still am praying about it. I know that Jesus has been working within me about pride because I had been feeling really good recently and meeting people is not wrenchingly uncomfortable.

This is certainly interesting to me. Perhaps, one of the reason why I didn’t get an A in genetics was part due to myself, referring to my ego. I didn’t put in my best work for this class and I should have waited to take this class later in the year. I approached it incorrectly when my background in biology isn’t quite solid, rather my studying skills isn’t quite solid either.

Anyway, I learn something today and should might as well be celebrated for and talking to Dr. Benitez was certainly interesting. He seems wise.

From now, I will continue to hold on to Jesus and ask for his direction. I will still be praying about my sins and trusting in Him to work on those. This is certainly a fascinating day, having conversation with people and learning about their experience is treasure.

I love and thank you, Jesus for this opportunity. I learned about the words ego and mindfulness was intriguing. I will look into them more. Is it in God’s plan for me to look into this?

Trying to decide on what to major

What a decision to make when it comes to deciding on what to major in college. If all jobs in the world pay the same, which of course is not the reality, then I probably would love to learn how to make metal jewelry such as earring, necklaces, and bracelets. However, I do consider a factor in what the world needs, meaning what degree I choose to pursue in college will most likely land me a job after graduation, because for me, going to college is to eventually get a job, potentially a career. I sort of certain that I wanted to go to a med school, but not all pre-med will be accepted, therefore, I think it will be a good idea to major in something that will hopefully be a return in investment spent on college and eventually assist with the future.

I am was sort of interested in a degree in nutrition, however, I was reluctant to declare it for a major because there is not a high demand for a dietician in the market per say. I was also interested in graphic design or web design, however, people said that this skill can be self-taught, and a college degree is not require necessarily. I was also interested in  biology, however, I am pre-med and I am already taking quite a bit of biology courses in a sense, and therefore, I think I can hold on to taking classes that I am interested in such as immunology, virology, histology, microbiology, etc in medical school or maybe buy a textbook and read about it instead, which highly may not happen unless I strongly feel about reading them 🙂

Life is structure and specialize. Even a college major is (mostly) limited to pursuing one thing head on and not in pursuing multiple tasks. Well not all human desires and interests are structure, some people have multiple interests, which most do, but they will still be limited to choosing mostly a particular degree.

Over the Thanksgiving break, my dad and I had a talk about my undecided college major, which I should soon decide on, eventually, because I am already a sophomore in college. He was talking about how our world still revolves around money, as long as we use this media of exchange and measure value, therefore a degree in business should be worth it, right? I am not sure about that, I have no idea enough to say whether or not a degree in business would land me a good, happy job.

My dream job,  I think, is to become a medical doctor, but in life, there is also “the what if” such didn’t work out then I should have a back up plan. I would love to wake up and do the work I enjoy doing and I think that’s surgery. It involves working with tools and very much hands-on, which has always been something I enjoy! I love playing tennis, table tennis, badminton. Do you see the correlation? All of which involve an instrument and that’s why I am quite positive that my dream job is to be a surgeon.

Aside from my ultimate goal, I think that being an accountant would allow me to perhaps work in a bigger cities and hopefully have some autonomy working in an office and dealing with numbers, which will be quite repetitious. I actually do not mind, I think, working in an office and doing my own thing as an accountant. I will get to wear a suit, perhaps, dress “professionally” and live preferably in a bigger cities doing fun, city stuff.

I don’t know… wherever I ended up is ultimately in God’s hand. But He being a just, free, and loving God, he does allow for me to make a decision and will support me if he sees that it’s good.

I know for sure that whatever I do that I must do so to glorify Him, which will in turn, also bring me joy and happiness.

Form now on, I simply wanted to do and be involve in the things I enjoy, I will never stop believing in Jesus and seeking Him, but I will also will search for thing that I have interest in while in college doing this undergrad.

One thing became apparent to me that I am no longer interested in the sorority, I am still part of. Ironically, today was actually the day, I got initiated to be an active member. I even got a charm in Greek letters emblemed in the our sorority’s name; however, I haven’t told anyone about deciding to not be part of it next semester.

I did enjoy my time there a lot. It was God’s plan for me to be part of it in order for me to grow closer to Him, which I did, felt it, and knew it. However, I will still be praying to Jesus whether it is in his plan for me to become inactive and not merely my own decision.

If I were to decide to be inactive, I will defiantly need to be in touch with a church, so that I can still have a Christian community that help me grow in Him continually.

Next semester though, I definitely wanted to take a metal smithing course, which is a brand new art course at my college.

Along with that, I might decided to major in accounting. I also wanted to learn about stocks. I am not sure if stock will be cover in my accounting course.

Yeah, I think, accounting will be a useful major to pursue and I have an enough interest to learn about them. I don’t hate number and certainly the autonomy in the job.

To end this, I wanted to thank God each and everyday I am living and pursuing him. My life has been more meaningful and together because of Him. I was able to be a better self because of him in my life.

Another Day To Be Praised

I have had 2 great days in a row and it was all because of Jesus, the Holy Spirit, and God.

People often say that God will grant us happiness when we walk with him and that he will satisfy, fulfill, and reward us for a walk with him. I remembered praying about wanting to experience the journey with Him, and the past two days has been amazing, and I cannot wait for more of his plans. I have been praying to him about wanting to love people just as he would want me to love them. I also asked him for direction and guidance of how to love his people, his creation.

I have also been praying to him about my pridefulness and because I got a lot of those going on and it is causing me to be unable to connect with people and to view them just as broken as I am. I want God to show me how to love people, to be kind and gentle. I want to view people according to how God would want me to see them.

I also been praying for my action to reflect Him, so that when people see me, they can ask me why I am this or that way, then I can point and credit God and to tell them that it is because of Him I am this way and that without him I am super broken and unstable in all of my ways.

I want to be God’s good representation, to be the little light house on the hill for the broken, the lost to see, and once they arrive, I will welcome them and tell them about the one who built this house, the one who furnished the floor and ceiling. That this light house was a wreak, but because of God, this light house is under going a lifetime improvement and is waiting until the day that the builder return to proclaim his great name!

How uncoincidental is God’s work. I’ve been praying to him about wanting to love people according to Him. I am on a plan (devotional) on my Bible App about Love Like Jesus. And just a couple of minutes ago as I was opening my Instagram and the feature image popped up about “Love one another,” just according to my prayer to Christ. I am in awe and amaze of God’s work and timing. Thank you, Jesus.

Delicious Lunch

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Another praises adding to this is what a delicious lunch I had today! I warmed up my leftover burrito bowl I bought yesterday from the Market at Stangel/Murdough student residential hall. I do not have leftover because I finish all my food most of time time, unless I am in a hurry or the food was too much. The reason for my leftover was the ladder. In addition to my leftover burrito bowl, I decided to make scrabble eggs to go with it, which tasted great. I found out about adding milk (I use almond milk) to my eggs made them soft and fluffy just as how I liked them. I remebered thinking how this lunch tasted great, was more delicious and special, which I thanked him more.

I also had a great time listening to lectures in my sociology and genetics class. At the end of my sociology lecture, I decided to tell Dr. Koch how entertaining his lecture was today (as the talk made me smile and I had great time listening to his stories), which I also thanked God more.