What do you do when you couldn’t fall asleep after an hour has passed by…

To finish the title…. is to write a blog. I have had an unhealthy, irregular bedtime routine. I simply do not go to bed on time and when I decided on going, I simply could not fall asleep right away in the manner that I was used to in the past. It was absolutely not enjoyable and frustrating.

In my last previous blog, I posted about my final exam and today was actually my last day of final, which means that my winter break is now of to a start.

I was sort of dreading about the genetics test for sometimes, but I prayed about my worries and realizing that I am in God’s hand. I shouldn’t be too worry because he sees more than I do. If I were meant to head on in the direction that I am aiming towards then if he sees that it’s good then he will supports me.

I also realized that getting an A is not everything. I certainly feel good maintaining it, but even if I don’t then I shouldn’t stressed over it because getting an A shouldn’t be where I seek contentment. I must learned to be okay with not having an A and instead shifting my focus away from getting an A to doing my best and trying to enjoy the subject. I realized that focusing on getting an A created pressure and dis-contentment of the learning process and if I enjoy what I do, the job will be more willing than being force.

One thing from college is to learn about the “subjects” (school work, etc.), but also self. I learn from some of the mistakes that rooted in the mindset, therefore produces action leading to the consequence.

I have to say that I couldn’t have thought about this on my own, but from Jesus. He gave me wisdom and understanding that I couldn’t possibly found with my own conclusion. If would have dreaded about not getting an A in a class and potentially pouring negative thoughts to myself, saying that it was my own fault in not trying enough or studying enough.

This battle or learning experience taught me about mindset. If I were to begin a task with a better intention, an intention that ROCKS then the product regardless of the outcome should not be too disappointing because I, at least, started of with a good mindset and work from it without any thinking ahead or expectations.

So, I ate at a Thai restaurant today and I think my system has been in shocked because my stomach found it hard to digest the food. I am sort of getting weird feeling about it, causing me to conclude that I probably will not be going back there. I don’t know. I have been against putting hot food in a Styrofoam container as I believe (without having done the research myself, but simply heard that it is actually produce unseen chemical that the body shouldn’t be getting) that it is bad for the body.

Anyway, I really do hope I can fall asleep now. My body feels tire, but my mind will not stop thinking. It keeps on going. I really need to have a better discipline and it should starts with going to bed and getting up on time even on the weekends, even when it is least expected. This should be the routine that need to be put to practice. A daily routine that needs more attention and seriousness really do needs to be done. As my daddy always told me, and the Bible says to honor your parents, to go to sleep between 9 pm-2 am, I should honor his request or should I say multiple warnings.

Today, I met my friend, Shan, we went to eat at the Thai restaurant together and as she was dropping me back to my dorm, I asked her would she drive back home for six hours and her answer was yes, she would when she was at my age, but now, her body has changed. She told me that she can detected the difference in how she is feeling now versus five years ago, when she was 20. I was surprise by her statement because I thought that people probably feel older when they are in their 30s, but Shan will be 25!

Shan’s comment left me wondering about aging and how it is important to take care of the body and spirit, which going to bed at 4 certainly is not doing its favor as it needs restoration. I probably am getting wriggles that my mom is spending money on creams and moisturizers to make them disappear while my dad uses simply coconut oil. I have to say probably not directly to my mom, but I think my dad’s coconut oil seems to work better than her expensive Lancome or Estee Lauder products. The skin at his age is simply great! My dad looks 40 something when he’s in his late 50s.

I should now, do my body some favor and try to once again fall asleep, because I’m tire and feeling sorry for my body as it truly needs rest and a better habit from its owner.

 

Trying to decide on what to major

What a decision to make when it comes to deciding on what to major in college. If all jobs in the world pay the same, which of course is not the reality, then I probably would love to learn how to make metal jewelry such as earring, necklaces, and bracelets. However, I do consider a factor in what the world needs, meaning what degree I choose to pursue in college will most likely land me a job after graduation, because for me, going to college is to eventually get a job, potentially a career. I sort of certain that I wanted to go to a med school, but not all pre-med will be accepted, therefore, I think it will be a good idea to major in something that will hopefully be a return in investment spent on college and eventually assist with the future.

I am was sort of interested in a degree in nutrition, however, I was reluctant to declare it for a major because there is not a high demand for a dietician in the market per say. I was also interested in graphic design or web design, however, people said that this skill can be self-taught, and a college degree is not require necessarily. I was also interested in  biology, however, I am pre-med and I am already taking quite a bit of biology courses in a sense, and therefore, I think I can hold on to taking classes that I am interested in such as immunology, virology, histology, microbiology, etc in medical school or maybe buy a textbook and read about it instead, which highly may not happen unless I strongly feel about reading them 🙂

Life is structure and specialize. Even a college major is (mostly) limited to pursuing one thing head on and not in pursuing multiple tasks. Well not all human desires and interests are structure, some people have multiple interests, which most do, but they will still be limited to choosing mostly a particular degree.

Over the Thanksgiving break, my dad and I had a talk about my undecided college major, which I should soon decide on, eventually, because I am already a sophomore in college. He was talking about how our world still revolves around money, as long as we use this media of exchange and measure value, therefore a degree in business should be worth it, right? I am not sure about that, I have no idea enough to say whether or not a degree in business would land me a good, happy job.

My dream job,  I think, is to become a medical doctor, but in life, there is also “the what if” such didn’t work out then I should have a back up plan. I would love to wake up and do the work I enjoy doing and I think that’s surgery. It involves working with tools and very much hands-on, which has always been something I enjoy! I love playing tennis, table tennis, badminton. Do you see the correlation? All of which involve an instrument and that’s why I am quite positive that my dream job is to be a surgeon.

Aside from my ultimate goal, I think that being an accountant would allow me to perhaps work in a bigger cities and hopefully have some autonomy working in an office and dealing with numbers, which will be quite repetitious. I actually do not mind, I think, working in an office and doing my own thing as an accountant. I will get to wear a suit, perhaps, dress “professionally” and live preferably in a bigger cities doing fun, city stuff.

I don’t know… wherever I ended up is ultimately in God’s hand. But He being a just, free, and loving God, he does allow for me to make a decision and will support me if he sees that it’s good.

I know for sure that whatever I do that I must do so to glorify Him, which will in turn, also bring me joy and happiness.

Form now on, I simply wanted to do and be involve in the things I enjoy, I will never stop believing in Jesus and seeking Him, but I will also will search for thing that I have interest in while in college doing this undergrad.

One thing became apparent to me that I am no longer interested in the sorority, I am still part of. Ironically, today was actually the day, I got initiated to be an active member. I even got a charm in Greek letters emblemed in the our sorority’s name; however, I haven’t told anyone about deciding to not be part of it next semester.

I did enjoy my time there a lot. It was God’s plan for me to be part of it in order for me to grow closer to Him, which I did, felt it, and knew it. However, I will still be praying to Jesus whether it is in his plan for me to become inactive and not merely my own decision.

If I were to decide to be inactive, I will defiantly need to be in touch with a church, so that I can still have a Christian community that help me grow in Him continually.

Next semester though, I definitely wanted to take a metal smithing course, which is a brand new art course at my college.

Along with that, I might decided to major in accounting. I also wanted to learn about stocks. I am not sure if stock will be cover in my accounting course.

Yeah, I think, accounting will be a useful major to pursue and I have an enough interest to learn about them. I don’t hate number and certainly the autonomy in the job.

To end this, I wanted to thank God each and everyday I am living and pursuing him. My life has been more meaningful and together because of Him. I was able to be a better self because of him in my life.

Another Day To Be Praised

I have had 2 great days in a row and it was all because of Jesus, the Holy Spirit, and God.

People often say that God will grant us happiness when we walk with him and that he will satisfy, fulfill, and reward us for a walk with him. I remembered praying about wanting to experience the journey with Him, and the past two days has been amazing, and I cannot wait for more of his plans. I have been praying to him about wanting to love people just as he would want me to love them. I also asked him for direction and guidance of how to love his people, his creation.

I have also been praying to him about my pridefulness and because I got a lot of those going on and it is causing me to be unable to connect with people and to view them just as broken as I am. I want God to show me how to love people, to be kind and gentle. I want to view people according to how God would want me to see them.

I also been praying for my action to reflect Him, so that when people see me, they can ask me why I am this or that way, then I can point and credit God and to tell them that it is because of Him I am this way and that without him I am super broken and unstable in all of my ways.

I want to be God’s good representation, to be the little light house on the hill for the broken, the lost to see, and once they arrive, I will welcome them and tell them about the one who built this house, the one who furnished the floor and ceiling. That this light house was a wreak, but because of God, this light house is under going a lifetime improvement and is waiting until the day that the builder return to proclaim his great name!

How uncoincidental is God’s work. I’ve been praying to him about wanting to love people according to Him. I am on a plan (devotional) on my Bible App about Love Like Jesus. And just a couple of minutes ago as I was opening my Instagram and the feature image popped up about “Love one another,” just according to my prayer to Christ. I am in awe and amaze of God’s work and timing. Thank you, Jesus.

Delicious Lunch

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Another praises adding to this is what a delicious lunch I had today! I warmed up my leftover burrito bowl I bought yesterday from the Market at Stangel/Murdough student residential hall. I do not have leftover because I finish all my food most of time time, unless I am in a hurry or the food was too much. The reason for my leftover was the ladder. In addition to my leftover burrito bowl, I decided to make scrabble eggs to go with it, which tasted great. I found out about adding milk (I use almond milk) to my eggs made them soft and fluffy just as how I liked them. I remebered thinking how this lunch tasted great, was more delicious and special, which I thanked him more.

I also had a great time listening to lectures in my sociology and genetics class. At the end of my sociology lecture, I decided to tell Dr. Koch how entertaining his lecture was today (as the talk made me smile and I had great time listening to his stories), which I also thanked God more.

 

A Day To Be Praised

Today is such a good day for me. It is 70 degree Fahrenheit outside and I am writing this on Tuesday Nov. 7, 2017. I typically do not enjoy cold weather, but today feels different, I actually don’t mind the cold.

I started of my day a little startled because I had a class to go, to take my 4th exam for my sociology class, at 11 am, but I had woken up at 10, which I told myself before I went to bed that I would wake up at 5:30 am to study. I looked at the time on my phone, which automatically adjusted for daylight saving, which shown 9 o’clock, so I breathed a little easier because of that.

I grabbed a banana, peeled it the correct way :P, and took a bite while also getting dressed. I realized that I need something warm because it was 40 degree something Farenheit outside this morning.

I then went to my kitchen where there is a little dining table in my apartment, so I sat and study for the remaining time while also ate a bowl of cereal for extra filling.

It was at 10:46 that I decided to packed my stuff and put them in my backpack, hopped on a bike, and rode to class. It was chilly outside as expected, but the cold didn’t bother me as much as I used to feel.

I got to my sociology class and was welcomed my the music of choice from my professor’s playlist. Dr. Koch opened his music before he began his lecture each morning, which created such a good atmosphere coming to class.

I sat at the very edge of the seating, I tended to avoid the middle seats and I also tend to pick to sit at the left side of the room. If you were to stand in the back of the lecture hall, you would be able to find me at the front to the middle row in the very left side of the room, which I suspected was where my brain felt most comfortable being.

I sat and looked over my note one last time before I take the test, but I was quickly distracted by Dr. Koch’s, all A’s, card trick that he often performed before we take the test on exam day. His card trick would always ended up flipping all 4 A’s cards as a sign for us to make an A on the test. This one particular card trick that he showed was by far my favorite, out of all the ones I have seen, maybe also because today was a great day in particular 🙂

Dr. Koch is an interesting lecturer, professor, and person. I have never met anyone like him before, which is of course, but his personally is quite distinct and will not be forgotten easily.

Now as I am typing my reflection, it doesn’t escaped my mind of why or how today has been particularly good because of the Father (God), Son (Jesus), and the Holy Spirit’s blessing and allowing me to feel good and contend.

This day reminding me of God’s grace that he has for me and reminding me of the conviction why I should continue to trust him, believe in him, and to place him first above all else, “moment by moment.” God is so good to me and his grace is immense and goes beyond my comprehension.

Dr. Charles Stanley

I have to confess that there has been time, actually recently (yesterday) that I planed on not attending chapter for Sigma Phi Lambda, which is a non-phanhellenic sorority and the greek letter translates to “Sister for the Lord.” Sigma Phi Lambda hold their chapter every Monday, which I attended regularly except one time in the beginning of the semester. Yesterday, which was Monday, I had planned on not attending chapter because I wanted to finished my homework. Well anyway, back track a little to yesterday when I came back to my apartment to make myself a lunch, which I made omelet, toast, and cut avocado. As I was eating, I opened YouTube and remembered that I wanted to hear one particular sermon from the Dr. Charles Stanley from InTouch Ministry, filmed at his church in Atlanta, Georgia. I found Dr. Stanley message about 2 months ago and I was hooked at how transforming his sermon impacted me. His sermon speaks to me and allows me to think and to be a better daughter to God. This one particular sermon was one of the many that Dr. Stanley preached. However, this particular one was the first video I saw of him, Taking Control of Our Thoughts– Dr. Charles Stanley, got me hooked. Dr. Charles Stanley is definitely my favorite pastor.

Anyway, so I had planned a week before that I will not attend chapter yesterday; however, chapter was a place not only to socialize with other Phi Lamb girls, but also an event that provide opportunity to sing praises and worship Christ and hear good testimony, teaching, and encouraging talks from the members. So, yesterday, as I was eating my lunch, I opened Dr. Charles video, Planning Without God – Dr. Charles Stanley. What I got out of his sermon changed my mind about not attending chapter. He mentioned that God cares about every aspect of our life and that it would be foolish not to ask for his direction and guidance when he would be glad for us to ask and to rely upon him. Dr. Charles’s message was so touching to me and it just made me happy that I can ask God about little things because knowing that he cares “about every aspect of my life” reassures and comforts me. It was just awesome that he cares so much for us than we could even care for ourselves, but we sometimes wanted to have our way, which Dr. Charles would say to be such a foolish act when God is omnipotent.

After finishing Dr. Charles’s sermon, I simply prayed to God about whether or not I should attend chapter and the answer was a loud, big, yes that I should and attending would be pleasing to God, to worship Him.

Another point that Dr. Charles’s mentioned was how important it is to LISTEN to God. To listen to what he wants us to do, act, think, or speak. God gave us the Holy Spirit that dwells on us and guides us. The Holy Spirit is a great Gift from God. I am so thankful for the Holy Spirit.

Chemistry SI Session Versus Chapter

On every Monday and Wednesday, are days that I also have an SI session for chemistry, which I found to be quite helpful for preparing for an exam. Attending my SI session on Wednesday is not a problem, since I am pretty much free on Wednesday. However, since my chapter starts at 7 and ends at about 8:15 pm, my SI session, on the the hands,  starts at 7:30, which has a timing conflict 😦 . Will it be an opportunity to sing praises and worship God or go to the SI session :/ Anyway, Sigma Phi Lamb also have a point system—going to each Phi Lamb event will earn a certain point(s), depending on the hour(s) of the event. The point system acts as a little incentive for girls to attend the activities and to meet the requirement to still be in Phi Lamb. The minimum is to make 20 points, which I has already completed. I can simply not attend any Phi Lamb event from now on and I will still be covered because I met the required points. However, it is more to it than that…

After realizing that I will go to chapter, I was rationalizing with myself that perhaps I can simply stay at chapter, sing a couple of worship songs, and then leave at 7:15 to make it in time for my SI session that starts at 7:30 pm. I was being so “cleaver” with this plan in trying to make my way around. However, as I was signing praises to God, I realized that being at chapter is more important than going to an SI session and it would pleases Him more than me trying to do my own thing for myself. I wanted to attend the session to make a better grade in chemistry, but God says that he has a plan for me, a plan to prosper me and not forsake me, something along this line, a verse in a bible. His plan for me will exceeds mine. The question is will I trust him. Will I trust him, to worship him and not attend the SI session. Will I trust him with my grades and beyond.

God shows me that if I am willing to trust him and to place him first above earthly things, he got me.

His Mercy & Power To Rescue

So I didn’t complete two of my homework, one for chemistry and the other from statistics, were past due dates, but somehow God’s power help me to go to both professor for each class, talked to them, and both of them were willing to extend the due date for me. God is greater than any of my worries or fears if I am willing to listen and obey his request.

I will be praying  that my faith and my trust in Jesus, God, and the Holy Spirit will continue to be strengthen, so that I can go out and to not be waver by the earthly perception, expectation, and ideas.

Other than a wonderful day, I thank him more.

Prayer

This occurred to me that when I am around other Christians, it was easy for me to feel belong and comfortable. However, I will be praying that beside being around other believers, my identity in Christ will be convicted within me, especially when I am among nonbelievers. That when I around nonbelievers, my identity in Christ will be where my heart rests and falls onto for guidance. That no matter where I am, who I talk to, sit next to, or listen to—-my identity in Christ will supersede because I am His. To act, to speak, and to think in a godly manner and that I would know who I am in Him. That will be my prayer that when I not around other believers that the Holy Spirit would guide my action and thinking and to be the little house on the hill 🛤.

I will still be praying for me to love people for they are God’s creation and that I will love them just as God also loves me and them. I wanted to be able to love people, nonbelievers and believers alike, just as God does.

Oh Man!

Oh Man! What a day I had. I woke up at 10 am by the alarm clock alerted me to go to sociology class at 11 am, so I somewhat quickly got dressed, ate a banana, checked my email, hopped on a bike, and peddled to class hurridly. I made it just in time, so I sat waiting for my sociology professor to start lecture. Meanwhile, I simply grab my iPhone, remembering wanting to open Instagram, but decided not to, because it seems too much like what everybody was doing mostly, so I decided to do the thing that seems better.  I opened my Bible app and began the plan of the day about being better equipped to spread God’s love.

The reason, I titled this “Oh Man!”, which does not mean much, except “oh man!” guessed what’s happened today to perhaps hook your attention and it was the first thing that popped to mind when I decided write.

How do I begin this. I have to say that my sociology class, taught by my professor, is thought provoking. He mentioned many topics that is making me ponder from time to time, which I still do now.

A little background about my sociology professor, who is not just a professor, but also a minister, co-chair of some department, and a person who couples asked to marry them. My professor is a sarcastic guy and sort of LIKE himself, in my opinion. When he teaches the class, in some instances, it almost seems as if he is pondering to himself. I like his lecture a lot, but there has been time I questioned him as a person. He mentioned something about doing thing because of credential, hey! he is honest about that part, which made me think, well okay, maybe being a minister part is also because of credential and maybe his relationship with Jesus may not be a part of why he is in the field.

I enjoy his lecture and many of his point of view, but it made me think that not all speaker who are representing church or Christianity are preaching from the love of Christ? I am sure there are people who do so out of love for Jesus, but there may be people who also don’t.

Since the day that I realized I needed Jesus and I am still needing him right now as I am typing. That without him, I would be anxious, restless, care about the people, about the world, be full of myself, and wouldn’t be happy. If given the opportunity, I would share God loves for me and how he is transforming and helping me by gifting the Holy Spirit to guide me on a moment to moment basis.

If anyone came upon my blog and is going through a hard time, I wanted to tell them about Jesus and how he is rescuing me. I wanted to share his love for me to you. I realized that on my own, I am empty, but through him I’m constantly wanting more and more of him.

Again, Jesus is the key to why we are not happy with ourself and who we are.

I wanted to end this tonight. Thanks for reading along and making sure to comment and don’t be shy to comment on my blog.

Do you see Color?

How interesting is this that as I laid my head on my pillow, praying that the Lord would help me study for my genetic test this up coming week, and as thoughts are running through my head, this one particular thought certainly got me triggered enough to open the lamp, undergoing rapid light distinction that I had to squinted my eyes. I grabbed my phone “You-tubing,” “What is white people?” Which is such as weird question to ask, but I wanted to find the answer. Perhaps I could find something about how they were raised, what they were taught, what sort of values they were being reinforce and/or punish, etc. Perhaps learning more about White people will help me to understand them better.

The thought of me at the Truck or Treat event I volunteered this evening at the High Point Village was a place where I met a girl named, I honestly couldn’t remember her name. The meeting of her led me to think about the fact that I did not have any close white friends. In fact, I feel as if there is something disconnected or not in sync. This thought made me ponder or hypothesize that how I grow up and how Whites people grow up may be different. I pray that God would allow me to see something that I have been blind to. I am not sure what else to say.

I moved to the United States 8 years ago, in 2009. I did have some worries about fitting in or making friends because I couldn’t speak the language and I look different.  Will I be able to make friends, are they going to like me, etc. Growing up in my home country, everyone is Thai, and I did not feel different. We are the majority. I felt pretty inclusive with no distinction. However, that obviously changed when I came to the United States. I can recalled perhaps 6 minutes ago, realizing that I was being labeled as Asian for the first time in America. It’s not that I didn’t know that I am Asian. It is just that I didn’t think being Asian is anything special, especially. It’s just I am Asian and so what or what about it? I also realized that people in America had this picture of how Asians were or are supposed to be and it is not that they are so wrong in doing so, but because I honestly sometimes wonder in similar maner about how other races may be like as well.

I grew up in a place that are willing to assimilate, a term I recently learned in my sociology class, which my professor described as “the willing to celebrate other culture.” Growing up in Thailand, I remember growing up learning that Thai people also like other cultures as well as their own and sometimes would also criticize their own sets of values. It is not that Thai people aren’t patriotic, it just that they also sees their own flaws, so Thai people will state the pros and cons of other cultures and compare those to themselves. I remember seeing differences as being pretty good, except maybe the Burmese because we had war with them. But Thailand loves other nations, all over. They still are today. I’m not bias here, but again that depends on your judgement. I grow up where I love and wanted to explore other nations and their people. This made me realized how racial issue in America is really a thing. I am not sure how to address it in a way that I feel would be wise.

One thing that I still am certain about how I ought to feel about race is that I don’t want to see color. I want to see people being people and not because they are black, hispanic, white, asians, or whatever, mixed race. It should not matter and does not matter. I don’t get it. We’re being taught to see color. Perhaps nature allows us to distinct our differences? Do nature do that? Do lions, tigers, wolves, rabbits, turtles, buffalos, or kangaroos hang out within their own kind? I guessed most of them do, actually. Anyway, I think that it is normal for us to hang out or be around those who we feel have the more in common to us, which explains a lot about race in particular. It make sense now. Still, I’m debating with myself here. Animal have many different definition, I used the first definition from Merriam-Webster that define animal as “any of a kingdom (Animalia) of living things including many-celled organisms and often many of the single-celled ones (such as protozoans) that typically differ from plants in having cells without cellulose walls, in lacking chlorophyll and the capacity for photosynthesis, in requiring more complex food materials (such as proteins), in being organized to a greater degree of complexity, and in having the capacity for spontaneous movement and rapid motor responses to stimulation.” Therefore, if we agree with Merriam-Webster then we are also animal, but we are the kind of animal that know truths and lies, since our ancestors ate the apple in the Garden of Eden. We have thoughts and ideas. Therefore, being racist is not right. Do you have the right to be racist? There is a law against discrimination in work place, etc, but there is not law against prejudicial, because prejudicial concerns human value, so I guess it’s okay to be racists as long as it doesn’t lead to having racist behavior? Well, why not just not be racist in the first place, so that way, we can protect others and ourselves from breaking the law? No that is not the point.

I would encourage all of you who may came upon this blog and my ponder at 3 in the morning to think about why color should not matter but seeing people for who they are despite the color factor should be something to think about. We are similar yet we are also different. We are human with set of values that we hold upon. The law of nature says something about “we are all created equal.” How true is that do you think? Obviously not so true, since there are income-gap in our nation, the division of labor, and specialization, but these things are all manmade. We need doctors and lawyers as much as we need custodians and trash collectors. We again were taught to categorize what jobs were consider more prestigious than others similar to how we are taught to see the color we feel okay with and other a little different.

I am not sure if I am arguing, persuading, simply rambling, or roughly all three of the above. At the end, I think I want to see and love people as who they are regardless of the color of their skin or how they look. Seriously, life is more to it than that.

So to all of my future friend out there who will look different from me because I don’t think there is another me in this world. I am looking forward to meeting and getting to know you regardless of how you look. I don’t want to make an assumption that you might be different from me because if I were to think as such then I also don’t think we will become friend. I want to meet you without any expectation. I simply wanted to meet you with a hopeful attitude and open mind, which I am curious to see of how this would turn out.

 

There has been times…

There has been times when I am sitting with 250+ people in a lecture hall in college and wonder, “What am I doing here, exactly?” and why am I only listening to, who knows, so called “professor.” I had these thoughts that what these professors’ life had been before they got into this position, where they had 250+ something audiences, some willingly, most, I am guessing, unwillingly listening to them talk about something that more than likely will not be retained, other than perhaps emotional-connected topic. Seriously, I wonder why in the world am I listening and lacking facial expression. It was such a huge class, so it was harder to ask multiple questions when I wanted to ask because that’s the way I engage truly. The fact that information comes out of professor’s mouth to 250+ students ears, I wondered whether these information will actually be processed or were they simply went out the other ear.

I am sure there has been days when I love going to lecture, those days are typically days I prepare for class. Still,  I sometime wish that I can interact and ask questions and not simply sit like a stone and listening to words. 😪

So far, I am still questioning one of my professors motive about teaching the class of whether or not she cares about passing on her understanding of the concept to the students or is she simply going to let the textbook teach us. I strongly belief that human’s way of understanding the material from the textbook and apply in words to other human being can be easier to understand than learning the material on our own. Once I understand difficult problem, I can teach the material to my sister in less than amount of time she will have to understand on  her own because I knew which parts were tricky or confusing. Teacher or tutors whom were struggling when they learned the concept will tend to be better explainers.

I truly hope I can master chemistry and genetics, along with labs this semester. I will try to stay positive and motivated all throughout. For now, goodnight and sleep tight! 🛌💤